Hey Vujacic, Please Leave the NBA

Posted by Brandon April 22nd, 2009

After watching last nights Lakers vs. Jazz game I remembered why I hate Sasha Vujacic so much; he’s the epitome of what’s going wrong in the NBA. Playing for the foul instead of the basket and crying (I mean that literally) over every flop that doesn’t get called, even though too many of his already do. With Manu Ginobili effectively out for the season (thank god), Vujabic has stolen the crown as the queen of the NBA.

Dear Sasha Vujabic, either quit crying and stay on your damn feet or please do the honorable thing and remove yourself from the NBA.

Sasha Vujacic

Vujacic throws a tantrum

Oprah’s on Twitter!

Posted by Chris April 21st, 2009

picture-1Damn.

I really liked Twitter. I liked getting updates throughout the day on what crazy things Rainn Wilson is doing, or how Eddie Izzard’s show went last night. I liked posting stupid pictures for people to see (or not). And I liked that only about 10 of my friends were on Twitter.

Then Oprah had to go and ruin everything. Pretty soon I’m going to get requests from all those people from high school I didn’t have the heart to reject on Facebook either  trying to “follow” me. Obscure relatives will want to follow my updates. 

I’ve come to grips with the fact that Facebook is no longer ours – it’s been hijacked by the 40-somethings of the world, and now I have to live with that. But, shit Oprah, couldn’t you have just left Twitter alone? We needed it.

Lady Gaga, I Rebuke You!

Posted by Pat April 6th, 2009

“I’ve had a little bit too much
All of the people start to rush.
Start to rush by.
A dizzy twister dance
Can’t find my drink or man.
Where are my keys, I lost my phone.
What’s going on on the floor?
I love this record baby, but I can’t see straight anymore.
Keep it cool what’s the name of this club?
I can’t remember but it’s alright, alright.”

The verse above comes from Lady Gaga’s smash hit “Just Dance”. The soul-less dribble found in this song makes the text messages of 12 year old girls sound like intricate scholarly poetry. This music is obviously trash, but who is Gaga, and where did she come from?

According to ladygaga.com, Lady Gaga is a stage name for Stefani Joanne Angelina Germanotta. The New York native derived her stage name from the Queen song “Radio Gaga”.

“I always loved rock and pop and theater. When I discovered Queen and David Bowie is when it really came together for me and I realized I could do all three,” claims Gaga. It’s one thing to make extremely catchy dance music with trite and senseless lyrics, but it is flat out ridiculous to call this shit “rock” and claim it was Bowie and Queen inspired. When TI shows up in the Lonely Island song “I’m on a Boat”, we all laugh and secretly tolerate his horrible music a little bit more. But Gaga really believes that she is making credible and progressive art, and that truly makes her a joke. So Gaga, I Rebuke Thee!!! Avoid this music at all cost. If you are looking for accessible dance music with lyrical depth and wit, might I suggest MIA, Of Montreal, and LCD Soundsystem.

Here is the ridiculous video for “Just Dance”. Try to stick with it until she sings, “why can’t I shut my playboy mouth?” Hilarious.

MIA – Jimmy

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LCD Soundsystem – Someone Great

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Of Montreal – Gallery Piece

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Paul Blart is a Big Winner

Posted by Chris March 27th, 2009

Mall Cop!

Kevin James seems like a nice enough guy. I mean, I’ve watched “King of Queens” a few times when nothing else was on. It’s just a fat-guy-has-a-hot-wife sitcom, but James is fairly enjoyable. And he was fine in “Hitch.” Whatever.

What troubles me is the success of “Pall Blart: Mall Cop.” As I write this, “Paul Blart” just surpassed a domestic box office gross of $140,000,000.

To put that in perspective, here is a list of the movies nominated for the Academy Award for Best Picture last year, and their earnings. Also, “Paul Blart” has been in theaters for a shorter time than any of these.

- “Frost/Nixon” – $18,000,000
- “Milk” – $32,000,000
- “The Reader” – $33,000,000
- “The Curious Case of Benjamin Button” – $127,000,000
- “Slumdog Millionaire” – $137,000,000

How the hell did this happen? Are we really such suckers for the lowest common denominator of comedy?

I’ll finish with one piece of related, positive news. There’s another mall cop movie coming out that looks risky, intelligent, and creative (Read: Another film that will make less money than “Paul Blart”).

Mastering the Flop: CP3(60)

Posted by Brandon March 26th, 2009

I’m a huge fan of the NBA, particularly the Nuggets, and i passionately hate many teams and players around the league. I hate them because they show no self-respect, flailing and flopping all over the place.

When Chris agreed to join the Diafero Collective blog he only request one thing, the addition of the “Things I Hate” category. I love him for that, because now I have the opportunity to call out all the little babies in the league that are ruining the sport.

First up is Chris Paul of the New Orleans Hornets. He had me infuriated last night after many horrible flops were rewarded with free throws, somehow the refs are still giving CP3 calls. The Nuggets won the game 101-88, but it would have been an even bigger lead if it weren’t for the horrible refereeing.

More on the flip side »

Fred Durst is Back

Posted by Chris March 26th, 2009

Durst

If you’re anything like me, you’ve probably been asking yourself the same question I have these 5 long years since the release of Limp Bizkit’s final album: “When will the multi-talented Fred Durst see fit to offer his art up to the world again?”

Nope. I hate Fred Durst. Who doesn’t? But what happens when something you hate makes something that looks good?

Recently, I saw a movie trailer for “The Education of Charlie Banks” that got me feeling a bit excited. “Charlie Banks” is an Independent coming-of-age story starring Jesse Eisenberg (Squid and the Whale, Adventureland). The movie ran the festival circuit in late 2007, winning the “Made in NY Narrative Award” at the Tribeca Film Festival, and by all accounts looks like a pretty decent movie.

The problem for me while watching the trailer occurred in the final seconds as these words crossed the screen: “A Fred Durst Film.” Shit. Did I accidentally get excited about a film directed by a man who named his band after this?

But, it looks like Fred Durst is back, and he may even have a reasonable film on his hands. Even so, there is hope for all of us Durst haters out there. He made this movie, too, which looks like a cross between “Little Giants” and “Are We There Yet?” And I mean that in the worst possible way. Plus, there are reports of a Limp Bizkit reunion tour later this year.

I just hope that “Charlie Banks” is as terrible as everything else I’ve come to expect from Durst. I know how to hate the man, but if “Charlie Banks” is good, I won’t know what to do. Wait for a summer blockbuster from the drummer of Nickelback, I guess.